Aka Ironyca Stood in the Fire – gaming blog
Another random, but this time angry, personal post – so consider yourself warned.
Today at work (I work at a university library) I was in a good mood, the podcast I was listening to was entertaining, everyone had been nice.
I was bringing a book cart up to the 1st floor, when one of the librarians walked past me as I pushed the button to the elevator. She threw a wide smile at me, and I returned it, assuming she was mighty happy as well today. Before she opened to door to the office area, she turned around and said “I’ve always wanted to ask you this…”
She was still smiling, and in this split second my head automatically finished the sentence for her: “What are you studying?” and conjured up a good answer “Oh I….” But I was wrong.
“…What is your fighting weight?” she said while still looking bright.
“I don’t own a scale, so I don’t know, but probably not much…” I answered.
“…yeah” she concluded and proceeded through the door.
My elevator came up and I rolled the cart in while trying to process what had just happened. It felt like a slap in the face.
I am skinny, always has been. I’ve had people, friends, family approach me numerous times, often with curiosity towards why on earth I am this thin. One friend insisted that I could confess in her that I was anorexic.
The issue just is – I’m not anorexic nor bulimic. I don’t consider myself fat, I don’t starve myself, I don’t purge. I am not obsessed by dieting, I try to eat reasonably healthily. I love cake – If replacing one daily meal with cake didn’t have any repercussions in terms of health, I’d do it. Food has never had an effect on my weight, in fact, it’s been unfluctuatingly low since I became a teenager. But carrying the stigma of some eating disorder surely brings out the inquisitively insensitive sides of people.
I’ve seen this librarian around, I’ve greeted her, but we’ve never had a personal conversation, I don’t even know her name. Why was it any of her business what I weigh? And what sort of conversation did she expect us to have?
These are the best approximations I could come up with:
Like.. what the fuck?
…I’m grapes by the way.